During our orientation, our on-site program director warned all the girls in the program to be careful about the intentions of Senegalese men. We all quickly learned why. When you are walking down the street you may very well get a marriage proposal thrown at you, or an affirmation of love. For some Senegalese men, meeting an American woman can be a sort of jackpot. American women are often assumed to be wealthy, fun loving, more “liberal” sexually (sometimes), and great entry ways into the United States. For others (the majority I’d say) an American woman is simply something different and, in many ways, exotic- someone new to talk to and learn about! When some Senegalese men spot a foreigner they turn on the charm. Because I am African American and look more like Senegalese women, I experienced this on a smaller, yet still notable, scale. My white female friends in the program were frequently courted and/or proposed to. When it was discerned that I was foreign, and American, I would also experience the “Senegalese seduction”. The attention can be overwhelming and annoying at times but then again you are a walking anomaly. Once you accept that that there is generally no ill will behind the stares (or proposals), you can just use the attention as another way to make friends in a new environment.
Category Archives: Sub-Saharan Africa
Women the home
Upon arrival in Senegal, I was quickly reminded that the Gender and Sexual Revolutions of the 20th century did not make it across the Atlantic. I have never been a big fan of domestic duties in general and in my real family chores were pretty equally distributed amongst my brothers and me. In Senegal, there was no such distribution. The woman is the center of the household. Without her work, very little in the house would be done. Husbands and sons occasionally have a few errands to run for the household but for the most part the home space is a resting space. Females from an early age take on main responsibility in the household. My eleven year old sister in my second homestay in Senegal cooked at least once a day for the family, swept daily, ran errands to the small neighborhood convenience stores, and took care of my 3 year old rambunctious brother- all while managing school work. Because I was still considered a visitor in my host family, I was not allowed to help my eleven year old host sister in many of her daily chores (although eventually my idle hands were put on semi-regular babysitting and cooking duty). It was really difficult for me to understand why an eleven year old student was cleaning the kitchen and yard before studying; while her brother watched television- my host mom could not understand it any other way. In Senegal, many families believe that it is important for young girls to learn the work that it takes to run a household so that they can make good future wives and mothers. So while washing dishes may not be my top priority, and I am nowhere near thinking of how to become a good wife, my eleven year old sister, on the other hand, is already acting like a mini Yaay et Jabar (mother and wife in Wolof).
What I Wish I Had Known
What I wish I had known before going to Senegal:
- Bring photographs of your life back home because friends and family you meet will like seeing it to gain a better understanding of who you are. I was constantly asked about my family and Alabama and I had very little to show!
- Bring or send a meaningful gift (which does not have to be expensive) to your host family, if staying with a host family. I brought t-shirts for the family from my hometown, but other students brought framed photographs of their hometown and some brought artwork that they particularly liked.
- It will not be difficult to make friends with people from the country that you are visiting. Even if you may have trouble with the language of your host country, a lot of young people (no matter the country) learn some English in secondary school or college and like practicing it (often while talking about American trends and politics) with their new American friend (I was nervous about this before going!)
- For the women: expect to be hit on from men, young and old, especially because you are American. It can get annoying, but it can also be a fun way to make friends and discover the city.
- Bring money to travel: while it will probably be far less expensive than taking a trip in the United States you should be prepared to pay for a hotel, transportation, and food for about a week (most programs give you at least a week off for either spring or winter break). It can add up. (But don’t let it deter you. Traveling in your host country can provide some of your richest experiences abroad.)
- If staying with a host family, make sure to spend time with them. It can get difficult as you make more friends, take classes, go out- but maintaining a good connection with your host families can prevent bumps along the way. If your family has a tradition of watching ridiculously melodramatic Indian soap operas Wednesday nights (as mine did) join in, make it a habit too.